By Dwip November 13, 2004, 4:27 pm Comments (6) RSS Feed for this post

To quote Regina, “Everything I am writing about seems really frivolous in light of the discussion on Dwip’s blog.”

So, because we can’t be putting on pseudo-intellectual airs ALL the time, let’s indulge ourselves for a while.

We’ll start with a quick note that this fortune cookie I just ate tastes disgusting, and just as quickly move on to, say, Star Wars.

*cue theme music*

Because, well, that lone guy in the Amazon rain forest is now alone. I too have seen the Special Edition Star Wars original trilogy. Hollywood Video is having this 99 cent per movie deal right now, and we’ve been indulging. So.

And really, you hear some really excited stuff about the SEs. Things like this thread on rasfwr-j. And you’ve heard a lot about the infamous Greedo blaster shot, and the evils thereof. And so you approach the whole thing with a sense of caution, rather like you would, say, a cute, fuzzy, yet obviously fanged rabbit.

You get the picture. Moving or otherwise.

So I watched the things. And mostly what you get is the cute fuzzy parts, sort of but not quite like this. CGI bantha herds and better city backgrounds and enhanced space fights and generally not bad. Most of it probably isn’t noticable unless you’ve been watching the movies for the better part of 15 years like…half the people I know. Hrm.

But there are fangs. Fortunately, they are small fangs, which doesn’t prevent you from leaping up in pain when they sink in, but at least you only lose a toe or something, and not your entire leg, like in Phantom Menace. And the fangs are:

The Greedo Blaster Shot. No. Just no. What the fuck, George? What. The. Fuck.

Any and all instances of redoing the music for something, like the new ending of Return of the Jedi. Grating and generally ungood. Also the dance scene in Jabba’s Palace in the same movie. I don’t think you’re really getting what Phantom Menace tried to tell you about being ridiculously stupid like that, George.

You’ve got all this high tech computer awesomeness, and you can’t improve the computer Death Star plan from the briefing in ANH? Because DAMN is that the 70s.

The entire ending of Jedi was something I expected to be a fang, but it turned out not to be in the end. The music sucks, and the montage of celebrating planets is sort of shruggy, but at least we have partying Ewoks. Marketable pack hunters rule.

So really only a few minor things as opposed to some nice additions. I see what George was trying to do, and generally I like it.

Also, I watched the commentary for all three movies, and it was mostly good. I like commentary, and I like listening to George Lucas do it, because he thinks a lot about some really interesting technical details. I also get a better idea of where he’s trying to go with this whole thing, and mostly I like that, too.

However, C3PO still sucks, and Gungans still suck more than I can possibly say. My sole comfort in the whole thing is that Jar-Jar is still solely responsible for the fall of the Republic, and I guess when it comes right down to it, that’s a good thing to justify some Gungan genocide with.

Movies and Television Comments (6) RSS Feed for this post
Comments on Frivolity
avatar Comment by Regina #1
November 13, 2004 at 7:26 pm


I loved the new ending of Jedi, but I was 9 when I saw it, so we’ll chalk that up to being young and impressionable, or something.

Also, I decided recently I have two reasons to see Revenge of the Sith. (Why does that title sound so craptastic when “Return of the Jedi” isn’t much more inspired?)

1.) Loyalty to the old SW, buried somewhere in there under masses of CGI and the disaster that is Hayden Christiansen’s performance in these movies. I want to finish the circuit out.

2.) Vader! With the James Earl Jones voice and the scuba-tube breathing. I mean, the costume and the voice *alone* should at least give us some propulsion in the direction of the originals. Should.

avatar Comment by Whir #2
November 13, 2004 at 4:33 pm

I don’t think I will ever willingly watch the new ones. I have the old ones on VHS and those are the True Trilogy.

avatar Comment by Tim #3
November 13, 2004 at 5:41 pm

*blissfully sits next to Whir in said rainforest, picking moss from between his toes*

Tim “HGTG comes out in 2005.”

Whir *looks up from laptop completely covered in solar panels hooked to ridiculously large satelite dish* “Dude, living in a rain forest sucks.”

Tim “Can I check my email?”

avatar Comment by Whir #4
November 13, 2004 at 8:52 pm

The heck is HGTG?

avatar Comment by Tim #5
November 13, 2004 at 11:22 pm

Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. It’s being done by Disney, but I’m hoping for the best.

avatar Comment by Rachael #6
November 14, 2004 at 11:54 am

Natalie Portman is hot, though. If I was a guy, I’d, like, jack off to episode 2 right when her cute little white suit gets all torn to shreds.

I guess that technically makes her a MILF. ;)